Strength Of A Book
by Matatabi-chan
Summary: 3rd Strength. Can a crazed Castle fan help Castle and Beckett get back on track, solving murders as a perfect team, after the painful reveal of Beckett's secret? Will they be able to work things out together or will they just continue to carry the pain?
1. Chapter 1

I DO NOT OWN CASTLE!

The manager to a small bookstore was placing a sign over the date and time one of her favorite authors would be visiting for a signing. She turned her blue eyes to read the 'canceled' sign before looking at the manager. Worrying over she asked the manager, "What's wrong? Where is Richard Castle going to be?"

"I'm sorry but the Castle book signing is canceled until farther notice." He watched her look at her as if waiting for more. She stared a moment longer. "His publisher will know more but as far as we were told his signing today has been canceled." The woman glared at him before turning on her heels and walking out of the store with the newest _Nikki Heat_ novel in her arms. The manager shook his head at her reaction before going back to work.

The tall woman with blue eyes and long brown hair walked back to the bookstore an hour later. She watched as people stopped to look at the sign before shrugging and walking away before she continued back into the store. She found the manager again and walked up to him angrily.

"I want to speak with Richard Castle." She demanded. The manager looked at her as if she were insane.

"He's not here and we are a book store. We do not have any contact information for the authors." He told her making her narrow her eyes at him. She took a step closer to him.

"I want to talk to him now. He was supposed to have a signing, and I came here for his signing. I want Richard Castle to sign my book." She demanded.

"Look lady. He's not here and he's not going to be here. So go home and write a letter to his publisher or something." He turned to walked away when a gun went off making everyone in the store look around for a split second before they went running. She turned and shot a cashier as she tried to talk her down. The cashier fell to the ground with a gunshot to the chest. More people screamed and started running from the bookstore. She walked over and slammed the doors shut and turned the lock.

"I came for Richard Castle's book signing. I want Richard Castle!" She yelled pointing the gun at the handful of remaining employees and customers. "Get him here now!" She yelled.

"Ma 'me we can't get ahold of the authors." Said an older looking man as he walked a little closer. Suddenly the gun went off and he dropped holding his leg. The bullet had hit his thigh to the outside, he cried out in pain as he rolled on the ground and another employee ran over to put pressure on the wound.

"Beckett." She answered her desk phone. She and the boys had been solving a considerable less amount of cases since Castle decided not to shadow her any more. He had told her the night they were waiting for Esposito to get out of surgery he wouldn't be in the next day. That was four and a half months ago and not once had he called them. Any of them. Beckett scribbled down notes before hanging up and looking at the boys a few desks away.

"We have a case?" Ryan asked.

"Yeah, let's go." The team started.

Ryan and Esposito were always happy to have a case. It meant Beckett was able to focus on the case instead of thinking about Castle. Esposito had filled Ryan in on what Lanie had told him and they knew Castle was hurt. They could see how it was affecting their boss. She was always looking off into space thinking when they had free time. Always staring at her phone with Castle's name pulled up before she shut it off once again. they both hoped the two would find a way to fix things, and soon.

They pulled up to the scene and were met with another detective. "Detective Beckett?" She nodded. "We were called in on a hostage case and the witnesses who escaped told us there were two people shot and killed before the doors were locked with several customers and employees locked in there."

"Then why is homicide called in now?" She asked wondering why homicide was called in when they were still trying to get to the bodies.

"Because of what the assailant wants. Rumor has it you have what she wants." He said looking at her as she furrowed her brow confused. "Richard Castle." Beckett stopped in her tracks as the boys looked at each other. "What? Aren't you the one he follows around?"

"I was." Beckett nodded. "But a few months ago we went our separate ways." She needed to focus on work. She could think of Castle. Every time she did she could only see the pain in his usually happy and loving eyes. The detective looked at her.

"Can't you get a hold of him?" Beckett paused, glanced at the building that was surrounded by police cars before looking back at the detective and nodded. "Tell him to get here fast and we can start a plan." He walked away leaving Ryan and Esposito at her side.

"We can call him." Esposito offered. Beckett stood still a moment longer before shaking her head. "Beckett-"

"I am capable of calling him, Espo." She cut him off as she pulled her phone from her pocket and walked away dialing.

Castle sat behind his desk. His computer on his desk with a blank page seemingly mocking him as his mind refused to work on the next Nikki Heat novel. He couldn't even finish the last book properly after he heard Beckett admit to Lanie that she had heard him and then tell him that she lied. His heart still felt crushed in his chest when he remembered the last time he saw Beckett.

(flash)

The night after they left Esposito's room. They had walked silently down the hall to the waiting room. She stopped and looked at him but he couldn't get himself to look at her at that moment. "I really am sorry. This is want I wanted to avoid." She said softly before looking down. "I was confused. I had just been shot, Josh was at my side taking care of me and you told me you loved me. I was scared, Rick." She paused a minute to look at him sadly. "I just want you to know how sorry I am I lied to you."

"I'll, uh; I'll call when I get some things worked out. I have a book tour and all coming up." She just nodded.

"Do you want a ride home at least?" She asked trying to find any way possible to make up for the pain she had cause by her lie.

He shook his head. "No. Thanks for the offer." He said flat. No emotion in his voice as he looked down at her moments before he left her standing in the waiting room emotions flooding through her.

(flash)

He sighed and sat back in his chair rubbing over his face. "Richard?" He heard his mother call before she opened the office door and walked in. "Richard. Are you still in here sulking?" She asked as he turned his now faded blue eyes on her.

"Don't start, mother." He told her as she shook her head and sighed as his phone buzzed. He looked at the name before sending it to voicemail and setting it back on his desk.

"That Beckett?" She asked and watched him nod. "She's reaching out and trying to talk to you. You should take the olive branch."

"Mother, I can't just forget that I told her how I felt and she pushed it off like it was nothing. She's the only one I've felt like this with and she pushed it aside like this was an everyday thing."

"Well to her it is." He looked at her. "You're public image, Richard you're a player to the public. Yes, she knows more about you than those fans but she still has to take into account what she sees. Until you can show her you're not like she will continue to rely on what she knows."

"I told her though. I don't walk around telling women that I love them every day." He told her as the pain surfaced once again before he pushed it back down.

"Richard. You have to let this go. She hurt you because she didn't tell you she heard you, I understand it hurts but sometimes it's better to hold back. What the person doesn't know doesn't hurt them, as the old saying goes." He just looked at her un-amused. "Really Richard. How is her not telling you any different than what you have been doing with her and her mother's case?"

"It's completely different." He said as life jumped into his eyes for a split second. "I am doing that to protect her and save her life."

"And she was trying to protect and save your heart." Martha shot back. Castle just closed his mouth and sat back in his chair as Martha walked around his desk to his side. "You need to talk to her Darling." His phone buzzed again and they both looked down at the screen to see Beckett's face on his screen. "Answer it. Talk about it and fix this mess. You are miserable without her. Work this out." She told him and watched him look at the screen another second before answering.

"Castle." He said roughly.

Martha heard Beckett's voice on the other end of the phone. "Castle, I'm sorry for calling but…." She trailed off and he could hear the sirens in the background. "Have you seen the news?" She asked. He furrowed his brow. After four and a half months and she calls to ask if he had seen the news?

"No. Why?" He asked plainly. Still feeling the sting of her secret.

"Can you meet me atPartners & Crime Bookstore?" She asked and heard his side go quiet. "Castle?" she asked wondering if he had hung up.

"I'll be there in ten minutes." He told her before they hung up. He looked at his mother who gave small smile.

"Even if you don't start dating, at least fix this so you're both not miserable anymore." Martha said as she stood to walk out.

"Mother?" He asked, stopping her. "What do you mean, both are miserable?" She turned and looked at him.

"Alexis said Lanie told her that Beckett's been a mess since everything happened. she said that the boys told her she is very quiet and stares off into space when they don't have work to do and even when they do have work they aren't taking a lot of cases. Richard, make both of you happy and work this out." She turned and left before he could ask anything more. Castle sighed before he started getting ready, grabbed his keys and was off to Partners & Crime Book Store.

Castle got out of the cab, paid the man and went to find Beckett. As he neared the yellow tape, several officers started walking over to him. "Sir, you can't cross the line. This is police business." They told him but he ignored them, ducking under the tape looking around for Beckett. "Sir." They said sternly as she walked closer and grabbed his arm. "You can't be here."

"He's with us." They heard looking over to see Esposito walking closer. The officer looked from Castle to Esposito. "He's okay." The officer nodded and let go so Castle could walk with Esposito. "Hey, how you been bro?" Esposito asked as he led Castle to Beckett.

"I've been busy. How have you guys been? Heard you aren't getting a lot of cases." Castle told him and saw the man look at him from the corner of his eye as he nodded.

"Castle." Ryan said making Beckett turn and look at him. The two men looked at Beckett and Castle as they just looked at each other, emotions swirling for a split second before they both pushed them away.

"What's going on?" Castle asked turning both their minds to the matter at hand, much to Beckett's relief. She looked over at the store that was surrounded by the police.

"I got a call about two people who were shot and killed and when we got here we found out it's a hostage situation." She started to explain.

"Then why did they call you?" Castle wondered.

"Because of what the person wants." Ryan chimed in. Castle looked confused.

"She is demanding to have you." Beckett told him before Esposito and Ryan were called to the side to talk to a few officers leaving Beckett and Castle alone. Beckett kept her eyes on the bookstore not wanting to see the look in his eyes.

"What does she want with me?" He asked breaking the silence.

"Apparently you were supposed to have a book signing and canceled it." She took the chance to look up at him and see him looking down.

"This the man she wants?" The original detective asked as he walked over to them. Beckett nodded. "Okay, my boys are going to get a Kevlar on and-"

"What?" Beckett cut him off making both men look at her. "You can't send him in there."

"Why not?" The detective asked. Beckett looked at Castle who was standing quietly.

"Because he is not a cop. He a civilian with a family to think of." She told him and looked at Castle to try to drive the point about family in.

"He's not going to be in danger. The lady wants a signature. That's what she keeps repeating on the phone. She wants Richard Castle to go give her an autograph. Go in, sign what she wants and walk out. My boys will take it from there." He told Castle.

"Then what's with the Kevlar. If he's in danger enough to have to wear it, he's in danger." Beckett tried to argue. "He's not going in there."

"I'll do it." Beckett looked at Castle and furrowed her brows. "She wants a signed book." He shrugged. "She's not going to shoot me… at least not until I sign the book." He added with a small smile. Beckett looked at him a moment. It was as if the last four and a half months hadn't happened. He was trying to make a joke out of a dangerous and life-threatening situation.

"Castle." She said making her look at him. "You don't have to go in there, there has to be another way to get her to calm down." She looked at the other man.

"Beckett, I'll be fine. She's a crazy fan, she's not going to shoot the guy who writes the books." Castle tried the tell her but got a hard look from her. "I'll go." He told the man who nodded and turned to walk back to his men. Beckett shook her head as they she walked him to her car and popped the trunk. "You still have it?" He asked as she handed him his 'Writer' Kevlar.

"I figured you might put yourself into some situation that you would need it. And look at that. You did." She told him as she shut the trunk and turned to walk away.

"Kate." He stopped her making her turn to look at him. "I meant to call you, I just… I needed to work it out."

Beckett took a step closer to him. "We'll talk about it when you walk back out those doors." The two stood, eyes locked, silently searching the others eyes for the words they wanted to say to the other. Castle pulled his jacket off and put it on the back of the car. "It will be better if you put the vest under your shirt." Beckett offered. "This way you're giving the look that you trust her." Castle looked at her a second before he unbuttoned and pulled his shirt off, putting it with his jacket before quickly pulling the vest on and redressing.

"Don't look so worried." He told her with a smirk.

"Just don't try anything okay? Go in talk her down, sign that book and walk out." They started walking over to the detective and his men. "Be careful, Rick." He nodded as the detective took over giving him directions.

"This earpiece will let you hear us and we hear you. You walk in and talk to her; we need to really see what state she's in. Just do what we say and everyone goes home alive." He told him before handing over the earpiece.

"Everyone but the two dead and the crazy lady who's doing the killing." Castle said low. The detective looked at him confused as to why he would make a joke about this but Beckett looked at him worried.

"That's another reason you have to be careful in there. She might be one of your crazy fans but you don't know what she'll do. Don't take risks and don't be you, Rick."

"You worry too much, Kate." Castle told her before looking at the detective. "Okay." He nodded before he led the way to let Castle walk into the store. A few minutes later Becket was leaning against the car watching worried as Castle walked slowly to the doors and the detective re-joined her.

Castle slowly knocked on the door. A minute later, an employee opened the door and let Castle in. Beckett heard Castle's voice on the radio the detective was holding. "You two are pretty close huh?" He asked making her look at him.

"We've been partners for four years." Was all she said.

"Why weren't you here like you said you would be?" Asked a female's voice. On the radio making both of them turn their attention to it.

"I had some stuff going on and couldn't make it." Castle told her.

"What kind of stuff is more important than seeing your fans?" There was a pause before they heard Castle sigh.

"Well, since you seem to be one of my most dedicated fans I'll tell you exactly what happened. But you have to make sure not to tell anyone else. Can't you do that?"

"Of course. Anything you say won't go any farther than me." She said with a happier tone.

"Well you see I had to take a break from working with the detective Nikki Heat is based off of." He said. Beckett could hear he was trying to choose his words carefully.

"Why?" The woman asked. The detective looked at Beckett whose eyes were glued to the radio. "Why would that stop you from seeing your fans?"

"Well not working with that detective and our friends made me pretty sad. I didn't want my amazing fans to see how sad I was." He said. "Why is it that you didn't just wait a little while until the next sighing?" He asked her.

"I… you said you would be here. you should honor your word. You lied. Do you know what that feels like?" she asked as she started to become more upset.

"I do." Beckett looked down sadly for a minute. "I know what it feels like but sometimes lies are there to protect other people." Beckett looked back at the radio. "They are used to save another person's feelings, to protect their heart." Beckett gave a small smile listening to him.

"If you know what it feels like then why did you do it?" She asked. They could hear the anger flare in her voice.

"Calm her down. She could do anything when she's angry." The detective told him.

"Because I was hurt. I was hurting and didn't think of my fans." He tried.

"You lie! Just like everyone else!" She yelled. "I can't stand the people who lie to me!" She yelled making Beckett pull the radio from the detective's hands. He tried to take it back angrily but she glared and turned away.

"Try to change the topic." Beckett told him. "She wanted a signed book try to get her on that topic."

"I heard you wanted a signed book." They heard. Beckett was relieved that he actually listened to her for once. "I pushed everything I was doing and came all the way out here just for you. You know not many fans get such special treatment. How about I check on the injured and they get out of here and then we can talk about the book and you can get a specially sighed copy. Okay?" There was dead silence for a minute.

"Castle how many wounded?" Beckett asked, she still hadn't given the radio back. They listened closely to hear Castle as he whispered.

"Are you okay?" He asked someone.

"Yeah, but George is bleeding a lot." A woman said.

"Castle?" Castle could hear in his ear.

"Bullet to the outer thigh." Castle said softly. He looked around and found two others with blood pooled around their bodies. He walked over and quickly checked to see if anything could be done. "Two dead." He said before looking back to the woman holding the gun watching. "Okay, can we let the others go before we have our talk?" The woman thought about it.

"Castle don't get stuck alone in there." Beckett said. "You get stuck alone she'll see no way out and only have you to use." Castle watched the woman nod before he walked over and helped George to his feet as several others walked over to help carry him out.

"What's your name?" He asked the young woman.

"Amanda. Amanda Baker."

"Okay, Amanda. Can you do me a favor?" He asked making sure to keep his voice level as he spoke so the crazed fan didn't think he was whispering secrets. "Tell my partner, Detective Beckett, to stop worrying about me. I can handle myself. My wonderful fan and I are just going to have a nice chat in the café." Amanda nodded before following the others out the door as Castle turned back to the fan. "I didn't catch your name."

"It's Chelsea Cline." She told him as he walked a little closer to him.

"Well Chelsea what do you say we go sit in the café and talk a little as I sign that book of yours."

"No lying?" She asked looking at him concerned.

Castle shook his head. "No lying." She nodded and Castle started to lead the way to the café to the side. "Let's talk." He told her as he stopped at a shelf to grab one of the books from the shelves. Chelsea jumped and the gun leveled on Castle. "Hey now. We were supposed to talk. What's with the pointing the gun?"

"You lied."

"I didn't lie about anything."

"People who lie need to die!" She yelled at him.

"I can't sign your book or write anything new if you kill me." He tried. "Besides you shoot me you're going to have all those police officers rush in here and tackle you. And three of them are my closest friends. They don't like it when I'm in danger."

"Then why did they let you in here?" She argued.

"Because it's what you wanted and there were people who were hurt badly in here. They want everyone safe."

"You lied to me! You said you were here to sign a book and talk to me. But you're just here to arrest me!"

Beckett looked at Esposito and Ryan as they stopped besides her listening to what was going on. "Castle get out of there." She told him. "Get out of there now." She saw a SWAT agent move even closer to the doors before there were three shots. The SWAT stormed the store as Beckett's heart dropped. She dropped the radio on the car and took off into the store with Esposito, Ryan and the Detective behind her.

"Clear!" One man called.

"Suspect is in custody and unarmed." Another said on his radio. Beckett ignored the commotion as she spotted Castle still on the ground.

"Castle." She said as she ran over and dropped to her knees. She saw him wince as he shifted.

"That hurts more than I thought." He said as he pulled his shirt open to see the three bullets imbedded in the Kevlar vest. "I think I need to get a new vest." He said looking up at her, as she couldn't help the little smile that tugged at her lips while she helped him sit up.

"You still don't listen." Beckett told him once he was sitting.

"I thought I did pretty well." He argued.

"Until you got shot." Esposito told him as they stopped in front of them. Castle looked at his vest again before giving a shrug, conceding to Esposito's thought. Ryan held his hand out to help Castle to his feet as Beckett stood back up and they walked out. Beckett and Castle walked over to the side, passing the crazed fan, Chelsea.

"Do I still get a special book?" She asked as one of the officers pushed her into the back of a car.

"That fan really was one of your craziest." Beckett said with a small smile as she helped him pull his shirt off and then the vest to reveal the three, already forming, bruises on his chest. He pulled his shirt back on and then his jacket once again.

"That is just one who actually acted. You have no idea how bad they can get." Castle said looking back at the fan who was still gawking at him from the back of a patrol car.

"She still thinks she's getting a book." The detective said as he walked over shaking his head. "You did pretty well for a civilian."

"I learned from a great detective." He told him.

"Well thank you for helping out. The coroner is taking the bodies of the manager, Daniel Evans and the cashier, Christina Martin. She'll be tried with murder as well as attempted murder on top of her slew of other charges from this escapade." Beckett and Castle both nodded before he left and they looked at each other.

"Castle. We need to talk." She said softly and saw him nod. The two turned and walked off to the side, away from the chaos to be able to just talk. Once a bit away they sat on the sidewalk. "I know I really hurt you-"

"You lied about something that was hard for me to say." He cut her off making her look into his blue eyes. "I understand why you did it, but what were you thinking?"

"I… I don't know." She said low looking away. "I was confused when I first saw you. I didn't know what to do or say about it. Then when I went to my dad's cabin I thought about it and it just took longer and longer to think about what to do. I had been shot, you told me you loved me and I was alone."

"You had your dad, Lanie the boys, Josh…. me." She shook her head.

"The boys told me what Josh did. How he shoved you and told you it was your fault. They told me everything." Castle just watched as fire flashed in her eyes for the briefest second. "I know he was upset but he shouldn't have done what he did or said what he did, especially to you. I broke up with him a couple days before I left the hospital."

"I was fine. He was angry. He really liked you." Castle told her trying to defend the doctor he never really liked.

"He liked me but he didn't really love me. And you were right when you said I hide in my relationships. I'm afraid to take the risk with someone, not matter how much I want to, I'm just too afraid of losing them." She nearly whispered. The two sat still, in silence for a minute before Beckett looked at him and broke it. "What do you want?" She asked making him look at her curious, searching for an underlying meaning but found none.

"I want to be beside you. I want this all to be fixed, for both of us to be happy." He told her and watched her look down sadly.

"I can't give you that."

Castle looked confused. "What can't you give me?"

"I'm not ready for anything. You're one of my closest friends, I can't take the risk with you. Not the way I am." Castle reached out, catching her chin with his finger to make her look at him. He could see the tears in her eyes, shimmering, ready to fall any minute.

"You are perfect." He told her. "I know you're not ready. You won't be settled until you have your thoughts in order. Just don't think I walk around telling every woman I talk to that I love them. I'm not that playboy the papers make me sound like." He paused as if thinking. "Well not after I met you. You're the reason I'm like I am now. Just don't throw everything away because you are afraid."

"Rick…" She trailed off.

"Kate, you are afraid, but I'm scared to death I'm going to lose you. Don't think you're the only one afraid."

"What do you want?" She asked again.

"I want you to be happy." She looked at him as he gave a small smile. "Just tell me one thing." She wondered what he could want to know. "Do you feel anything for me?" The question hit her by surprise. She sat silent, eyes just locked with his as a million thought flew through her mind. Her heart and brain in that everlasting battle over what to say and do, especially around this man.

Castle sat quietly, seeing the internal battle between heart and brain, hoping that she had similar feelings for him. After another minute she looked down at the asphalt as she answered. "I have felt something. I can't tell you that it's love or not but there is something there. I just don't think it's worth the risk when I don't even know what it is."

She looked at Castle who sat quietly a moment before speaking, "It's always worth the risk." He told her. "But I'll wait if that's what you want. I've waited this long and been through a lot with you, I think I can manage a little longer." He gave her a little smirk, seeing a little smile tug at her lips. "Next time, you tell me…. just not when I'm dying so I can say it back." He saw her smile and shake her head.

The two sat for a few minutes before Beckett looked back at Castle. "Thanks, Castle." He reached over grabbing her hand that was on her knee and holding it tight.

"Always." He answered as she turned her hand to hold his.

"So what now?" She asked him wondering where to go from here.

"Now, we keep catching bad guys and ruining their day." He smiled at her reassuringly that her secret was well behind them and they were back on track as the best team in the 12th.

"Let's get you back to the loft. You need a new shirt if you're going to be coming back to the precinct." Beckett laughed looking at the three holes in the button up shirt. The two stood and walked back to the car, with one burden lifted, and life back to normal. Castle looked at Beckett from the corner of his eyes wondering if she would be able to forgive him for not telling her his own secret. One burdened secret down, one to go.


	2. Note

To Ladybrin:

Thank you for reading my stories, I am really happy you enjoyed the ones you've read and i hope you've been able to read the rest in this series. I am planning on adding to the series so keep your eyes open for new additions.

To Guest from February 21st, 2014:

I am sorry you did not enjoy this story and I am sorry you felt there was no resolution at the end. My point of this story was to bring Castle and Beckett back together after the split of the previous story. These were written as the episodes were airing so I was using the previews as a base in each story so it's my own story based from when Castle finds out Beckett remembered and them moving forward. Again, I am truly sorry you did not enjoy this story and felt the need to say it "Sucked".


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